by Kevin Carr
A little white lie never hurts, right? Well, not exactly.
Sometimes we tell little lies because we don’t want to hurt our partner’s feelings, but when it comes to dating, honesty is important. And, there’s certain things we usually fib about â€” like how many people we’ve had s3x with or how we really feel about his inner circle â€” that can be even more hurtful to our guys and our relationships.
What things should you always be honest about with your man?
1. Your Birthday
I know the rule: You never ask a woman her age. However, when it comes to dating, this rule must be broken. Donâ€™t lie about your age. If heâ€™s turned off, at least you will know where you both stand immediately. Lying about your age will instantly make you seem insecure, especially if youâ€™re older. Who says PYTs have an age limit? Keep it real ladies!
2. How Much You Like Sports
Your interest in sports isn’t as important to him as you think. As long as he can watch the game, he’s fine. You don’t have to watch it with him. If you really arenâ€™t that interested in his favorite football or basketball team, it shouldnâ€™t bother him one bit. But if he takes sports seriously and youâ€™re misquoting stats, butchering player’s names and feigning interest in the score, it will be more annoying than endearing. He will know if your interest is genuine or not, so donâ€™t fake it.
Discussing your sexual history is always tricky, but it’s unavoidable if things between you are becoming serious. I know all women won’t be in agreement here but, when it does come up, I say be open and honest about it. If he asks how many people you’ve slept with before him, don’t give him the “safe” number. Give him the real one. If he can’t handle your answer, that’s on himâ€”not you. He should’ve taken heed when his mother told him to never ask a woman a question you don’t want the answer to.
4. Your Cooking Abilities
Nothingâ€™s more disappointing for a man than to be promised a “life changing” home-cooked meal only to be served a plate full of watery macaroni and cheese and questionable meat. So you donâ€™t know your way around a kitchen, thatâ€™s fine. It doesn’t make you less of a woman. Tell the truth and give him the chance to impress you with his skills. If youâ€™re both clueless, you can always order take-out.
5. Your Marriage Goals
Most women assume that talking about marriage will scare a man off, but thatâ€™s false. The man thatâ€™s right for you will want to know where you really standâ€”especially if heâ€™s on a different path. There is a way to be open about where you desire to be in the future in terms of your relationship without putting too much pressure on the present situation. Saying you donâ€™t want to be married when you clearly do, will send him running for the hills.
6. Your Real Thoughts On His Inner Circle
If youâ€™re not â€œcoolâ€ with his inner circle, you shouldnâ€™t pretend to be. While you should keep an open mind when getting to know them, it’s imperative that you find a way to be open with him about your reservations instead of forcing yourself to hang out with people you just donâ€™t care for.
7. How Cool You Are With Him Having “Female Friends”
Not every woman will be comfortable with her man’s best friend forever being a female. This is something you must be honest with yourself and him about up front. The issues you overlook in the beginning can potentially become romantic barriers later on down the line. Donâ€™t tell him youâ€™re â€œcool with itâ€ when youâ€™re not. Heâ€™ll see right through this one fast.
8. The Ex-Factor
If your ex is still in the picture, say so. Itâ€™s just as important not to hide a connection to an ex, as it is for him to reveal any women in his life. As long as you both keep it real in this department, there will be no unwanted surprises.
9. Your Bedroom Activities
Donâ€™t ever tell a man heâ€™s the best youâ€™ve ever had unless it’s the actual truth. You may want to feed his ego, but it wonâ€™t work that way if youâ€™re lying. If you tell him he’s the best then he has no room to improve. Compliment him but don’t overdo it. Heâ€™ll appreciate it the realness.
10. The “Real” You
Additions and enhancements are cool, but at some point the man youâ€™re dating should be able to meet the real you. I am attempting to tread lightly here. I know that at times certain outfits may require some “help.â€ But donâ€™t let padded bras, body shapers and hair weaves mask the real you. Thatâ€™s who he is most interested in, promise. Or at least, Mr. Right should be.
Keeping it real counts and could save you a whole bunch of heartache in your relationship! I’ll put up something for the guys in my next article.
Share your thoughts!