While I was at NYSC camp in November last year, I came across a girl who said having a car and a lot of money before marriage as a woman,would scare off men. I was shocked that people still thought like this! She wasnâ€™t the first,second or even the third girl Iâ€™d heard such from,so I began to wonder, WHO TEACHES THEM THESE THINGS?
Iâ€™m a graduate at 20 and I still have a lot of time before settling down. I do not however, foresee myself entering taxis,jumping buses and trekking until I marry. I will work hard and smart,make a lot of money and drive my car. In that girlâ€™s mind,she will find a rich husband who will buy her car. In my mind,I have calculated that if Iâ€™m trekking,itâ€™s a fellow trekker or bus hopper that will most likely try and catch my attention. I stand to be corrected though. If I had a car,no trekker would try and flag my car down to chat me up or is it the bus hopper that will ask for my number from his bus?
You know the saying birds of a feather flock together? Well thatâ€™s why in most cases the rich marry the rich. Its not usually for more riches, itâ€™s because of what they are used to. Dangoteâ€™s son will most likely marry Dantataâ€™s daughter and not me because they attended the same schools and parties, share the same tastes and relate better to each other.
Call it poverty,dependence or African mentality but I donâ€™t know why women are taught to limit themselves for men. Whenever I bring up this argument, someone always brings up the gist of a rich aunt who is over 40 and still single. I have one of those too,but Iâ€™m pretty sure its not her money chasing men. She just doesnâ€™t want a man.
From my own survey,most of the women abused in marriages are totally dependent on their husbands which is why they canâ€™t leave. Society made her understand before marriage that her husband would cater for her every need.
Iâ€™m serving in a new city,away from home and Iâ€™ve decided not to ask for a dime from my folks but to hustle and survive on my own. If I could be independent of my parents now,how much more my husband? Donâ€™t get me wrong,Iâ€™m not saying I donâ€™t want my husband to cater for me. All Iâ€™m saying is I donâ€™t want to be the type of wife who runs to her husband with market list every time she wants to cook soup.
Men need helpers not parasites. This starts from relationships where the guy supplies all the gifts and needs and the girl feels it is his duty and this continues up to marriage. A home where a man earns N500,000 and his wife earns nada,and a home where a man ears N500,000 and his wife N200,000, which is better? In summary, while some girls are searching for a rich husbands, Iâ€™m focusing on being a rich wife.
Have a nice weekend
Article written by Ivuoma Offor